HOW CLOSE IS TOO CLOSE?

Source: www.speakup.com.br

Language level: Upper Intermediate

Speaker: Rachel Roberts

Standard: American accent

HOW CLOSE IS TOO CLOSE?

BY RACHEL ROBERTS

We all know that body language and tone of voice account for a huge percentage of communication. Interpreting these non-verbal signals is particularly important in situations where the speakers don’t share the same mother tongue: for example, a negotiation or business meeting with a foreign client or business partner. Non-verbal communication is a very complex issue, and a culturally intelligent person knows that one of the first steps to understanding it is becoming aware of other people’s relationship space.

WATCH THIS SPACE

Image you’re sitting on the metro in an almost empty carriage. Another passenger gets on the train and, ignoring all the other free seats, comes and sits right next to you. how do you feel about this? If you’re British or American, you’d probably feel the other passenger was invading your space. On the other hand, if you come from a Latin Culture, you may have noticed how people from Anglo-Saxon or Northern European cultures sometimes take a step back while you’re talking to them, so that you end up chasing them across the room. They will also glare at you furiously if you accidentally touch them while standing in a queue. British and American people are very conscious of how their personal space is organised, and they have a strong belief in “first come first served.” If you get too close while waiting in line, they will immediately suspect that you are trying to push in. The French, on the other hand, have a practice of resquillage, or queue-jumping, that Anglo-Saxons find intolerable.

PROXEMICS

Apart from the basic question of how close you should get to other people, the distance you should maintain when you’re actually communicating with them often depends on their authority, age or gender. However, there are certainly cultural differences. The researcher Edward Hall coined the term proxemics to describe acceptable distance between humans and the idea of personal space. In The Hidden Dimension (1966), Hall argued that spatial relationships involve territory, proximity and a wide range of personal comfort zones. Proxemics defines four general categories of space: public space, social space, personal space and intimate space.

ACROSS THE UNIVERSE

Think of yourself at the centre of a small universe of concentric circles that surround and protect you. The outer circle is quite large, with a diameter of up to 8 metres or more. This is your public space and is the domain of public interactions such as walking down the street, or passing other people in a supermarket. The inner limit of your public space circle is about 4 metros. Come and closer and you move into social space, which steps about a metre away from you. In our social space we conduct exchanges such as meeting someone new, greeting an acquaintance, or generally interacting with someone who is not particularly well known to us.

A PERSONAL BUBBLE

Inside that last metre of distance begins your personal space, sometimes know as your “personal bubble.” As a general rule this region stops about 50 centimetres away from you, but it has the greatest cultural variations and subsequently can cause the most trouble! Personal space is used to separate people waiting in queues, or sitting on a bench, and only your good personal friends are invited into it. If anyone comes closer than 50 centimetres, they enter your intimate space. Usually only a small handful of close friends and relatives will be allowed into this domain, where you exchange kisses, hugs, whispers and intimate types of touch.

RELATIVE VALUES

The challenge for international communicators is that cultural expectations about these spaces vary widely, and the actual size of each circle will also differ from person to person. If someone is used to standing or sitting very close when they are talking with another, they may see the other’s attempt to create more space as evidence of coldness or a lack of interest. On the contrary, those who are accustomed to more personal space may see attempts to get closer as pushy, disrespectful, or aggressive. In these circumstances miscommunication is likely to happen and may lead to conflict, or could aggravate conflict that already exists. As we have seen, Anglo-Saxons usually have a wider “personal space” circle than most southern Europeans and Latin Americans, but even they might find Scandinavians standoffish and cold. On the contrary, Latin might feel their space was being invaded in Saudi Arabia. Here it is not unusual to find yourself almost nose to nose with a business associate. This is because social space in Saudi Arabia is the same as intimate space in most other cultures. Could you comfortably conduct a negotiation in such a position, without appearing cold of aloof?

AN INVISIBLE LINE

Certainly a great deal of cultural acceptance is needed and it’s equally important to pay close attention to the comfort of the people you deal with and, if necessary, modify your social distance. Otherwise you might risk stepping across that invisible line into their personal space and putting them under unnecessary and unintended pressure. How will you know? Well, their body language should give you some indications and next month we’ll be examining some of that non-verbal language that can say so much more than words. 

Art, Under the Neon Light

 Art Under the Neon Lights (no audio avaliable)

Created from glass tubes and rare gases, neon lighting is a colourful and instantly recognizable part of modern day advertising. Just think of downtown Tokyo, or Times Square in New York, or even “The Strip” in Las Vegas – all of them alive with huge neon displays.

Brighton, on the south coast of England, isn’t quite so full of neon, but it still provides plenty of work for Andy Doig, 44, who has been designing, building and repairing neon signs for more than 20 years. He runs his business. Fishtail Nelson, from a small worshop, which is full of neon, old and new, near the city’s seafront.

Doig first fell in love with what he calls the “magic in science” of neon on a visit to the United States (specifically, Chicago) in 1992. When he returned to the UK, he enrolled on the only neon trade training course in the country. He admits that it took him many years of hard work to master the skills needed to “blow” glass (which is actually bent over an extremely hot flame into the intricate shapes used in neon signs.

A COLOURFUL HISTORY

The first commercial sign is believed to have been produced by Georges Claude in 1912, for a barber’s shop in Paris. In 1993 Claude started exporting signs to the United States, where they were an instant success in outdoor advertising. There’s definitely something warm about the quality and colour of neon light. Visibly glowing (even in daylight), it’s easy to understand why people described the first neon signs as “liquid fire.”

All of today’s neon dates back to the experiments of German scientist Henrich Geissler in the mid-19^th century. His famous “Geissler – tube” was sealed and filled with vapour to produce luminous electrical discharge.

The signs made today by Andy Doig still use the same principle so who buys his work? Who are his usual customers? They’re all unusual!” he says, laughing. “The work comes from everywhere: theatre, bars, restaurants private individuals, art pieces, commercial lighting companies. Neon is very specialist work.

THE BRIGHTEST MAN IN BRIGHTON (available on audio)

Standard: British accent

Language level: C1 ADVANCED

Speaker: Rachel Roberts

Andy Doig creates those beautiful neon signs that you see at the entrances of shops and restaurants. He does this in his “Fishtail Neon” workshop in the English seaside resort of Brighton. It is a specialized craft that mainly involves glass-bending, or glass-blowing, and there are fewer than 100 neon sign manufactures in the UK. Andy Doig also likes to create non-commercial neon signs but, as he explained art and business don’t always go hand in hand:

Andy Doig

(Standard: English accent):

Getting the books to balance is a nightmare! So that’s the same with any small business. This year I’ve done lots of stuff, on an artistic side of things, so…and art, to me…I’m coming to terms with art is, and art is making something that you want to make, and are prepared to put time and money into something that you may never sell. And that’s kind of (a) weird feeling for me, coming again from (the) industry side. So I’ve done a lot of that, but now I’m left with a ton of stock and no money! And it’s like, “Oh my God!” it’s scary, but, equally, I’m happy to say that I’ve made some stuff that I’m really proud of and I really like.

MY ADVICE

And so what advice did he have for someone planning a career in this unusual profession?

Andy Doig

I’d say. “Right, well start glass-blowing, get training.” And the person you’re training with will tell you whether you’ve got it or not, after three weeks, four weeks. And quite often it’s not what you think. Quite often you think, “Oh, well I can bend that, that’s OK.” That’s not it.  It’s up here, it’s in your head. And you know who will go on to do it and who’s just doing it ‘cause they think it’s a cool job to do. It’s little things. It’s the subtle things that come across from the glass blower, the trainee, that tell you whether they’re going to do it or not. It’s obsessiveness:  you can’t fake obsessiveness.

IF YOU GO…

You can visit Andy Doig’s Fishtail Neon workshop at 282 Madeira Arches, Brighton, tel: (+44) (0) 1273 69 4662 . http://www.fishtailneon.com .

Keeping the Right Distance (Audio)

Keeping the Right Distance (Audio) 

By Rachel Roberts

Source: 

http://www.speakup.com.br/extras/ed288/exed288a.html

All credits for SPEAKUP Magazine and this is only a promotional advertising only education purpose by English tips blog. I also recommend English learners that keep in touch through SpeakUp in your country and take out a subscription, very helpful and resourceful English material. 

Rachel Roberts (Standard British accent):One of the most influential thinkers on the subject of cultural differences is Gerard Hendrik Hofstede. He defines culture in two ways: “culture one” is what we in the west usually mean by “civilisation” or “refinement of the mind”. It also refers to the results of this refinement, like education, art and literature. “Culture two,” on the other hand, corresponds to the way we are programmed to think, feel and act – a kind of “mental software.” We demonstrate culture two in everyday things, such as greeting, eating, showing or not showing feelings and keeping a certain physical distance from other people. It’s not genetic. It’s a set of values that we learn together with the other people who live in our social environment. Interestingly, values are among the first things children learn. In fact development psychologists believe that most children have established their basic value system by the age of 10. After that it can be quite difficult to change and, as we acquire these values so early in life, we are rarely aware of them.

POWER DISTANCEIn his studies Hofstede focused on four main areas: power distance, collectivism versus individualism, femininity versus masculinity and uncertainty avoidance. Let’s take a closer look at the first of these. Hofstede defines power distance as: “the extent to which the less powerful members of institutions and organisations within a country expect and accept that power is distributed unequally.” In other words, people in countries with a high power distance – like Malaysia, the Philippines or Mexico – expect and even desire inequalities. This doesn’t mean that Malaysian workers enjoy being worse off than their managers. It’s more a question of respect. For example, in the family parents are more authoritarian and teach their children obedience. If your Mexican or Romanian girlfriend says her parents expect her home by 10pm, you should take that seriously, if you don’t want to cause her problems! In schools, teachers are seen as wise gurus who decide what is best for pupils to learn. Teachers in Italian schools may have noticed that students of Filipino or Sri Lankan origin are often more attentive and respectful than their native classmates. Similarly at work, subordinates like to be told what to do. The ideal boss is seen as a good father, who “deserves” privileges, status symbols and a much higher salary. In politics wealth, power, and status go together. Politicians often gain power through charisma and family connections, and always do their best to look impressive. A large house, a chauffeur-driven car and even a playboy lifestyle can be important symbols of this power. 

CASUAL COUNTRIESIn countries with a low power distance, such as the UK, New Zealand and Austria, hierarchy is not appreciated and inequalities are kept to a minimum, or at least out of sight. Parents often treat their children as equals, and teachers are not so much all-knowing sages, as experts who transfer or channel impersonal truths. There is a smaller difference in salary between management and subordinates in the same company, and privileges and status symbols for the boss are usually considered inappropriate. Subordinates usually call their boss by his or her first name and expect to be consulted on important matters. People in positions of power will usually try to play their status down, emphasising that they are just like anybody else. Perhaps this explains why the British public was so shocked by the expenses scandal amongst their politicians. Brits don’t expect politicians to have special perks or a particularly extravagant lifestyle! 

FORMALITYMultinational companies would do well to bear power distance in mind. For example a management technique like “Management by Objectives” is very popular in the United States, but can be inappropriate in countries such as Malaysia or Mexico. In these countries managers would find it hard to delegate important tasks to their subordinates, and subordinates would feel uncomfortable participating in important decisions. Amongst European countries, France has one of the highest levels of power distance, so remember to be very formal and deferential when dealing with French management. On the other hand, don’t be surprised if a Danish or Irish colleague remains unimpressed by your titles. He or she will probably expect to use your first name, even if they are at a lower level professionally. And if you go to work for a British company, be prepared to show some initiative! As always, flexibility and acceptance are the key to good relations.Next month we’ll take a look at the differences between collectivist and individualist societies. In the meantime I’ll leave you to ponder over where your country stands in the power distance scale. 

THE EXPERT Gerard Henrik Hofstede

Gerard Hendrik Hofstede was born in Haarlem, the Netherlands in 1928. Between 1965-71 he founded and managed the Personnel Research Department of IBM Europe. He conducted a survey about the values of people working in local IBM subsidiaries in over 50 countries around the world.

GETTING THE MESSAGE WORLDWIDE BY RACHEL ROBERTS

Source of the picture: http://www.speakuponline.it

GETTING THE MESSAGE WORLDWIDE BY RACHEL ROBERTS

 Source: http://www.speakup.com.br

Language level: Upper Intermediate B2

Standard: British accent

Speaker: Rachel Roberts

During the recent G20 Summit in South Korea, President Barack Obama and the South Korean President, Lee Myung-Bak, gave a press conference. An American journalist asked President  Lee whether he had any concerns that        “U.S. policy might lead to a flood of “hot” money coming into the Korean economy.” The Korean President smiled and answered: “I think that kind of question should be asked to me when President Obama is not standing right next to me.”There was general polite laughter at this comment, but President Lee was probably not making a joke.

FACE-SAVING

In some cultures, particularly oriental cultures, it is an insult to embarrass someone, or make them “lose face” in public. If President Lee was worried about the possibility of “hot money” pouring into South Korea, he would never have commented on this in public, in case he made Obama feel comfortable and offended him.

You should bear these values in mind if you have to work or communicate with people from oriental cultures. In Anglo Saxon culture it is often permissible for a subordinate to make fun of the boss in public, as long as it’s done respectfully. In oriental cultures it is never permissible, and would be considered deeply offensive. Similarly, if you relocate to a managerial position in China or Korea and an employee does something wrong, you should never point out their mistake in public, unless you want to lose their goodwill forever. Such conversations should always take place in private.

THE JAPANESE FOR NO

This careful attention to protecting sensibilities can make communication difficult, especially if you tend to be more direct. If during a long negotiation with a Japanese company, you ask whether your proposal has been accepted, you would probably feel quite optimistic if your received one of the following replies. “If everything proceeds as planned, the proposal will be approved;” “It’s not easy to answer your question at the moment;” or “You should know quite soon.” In actual fact, these are typical Japanese ways of saying “Sorry there’s no deal!

The writer Edward Hall first used the expressions “high-context” and “low-context” to refer to how much speakers rely on things other than words to communicate meaning. These “other things” can be non-verbal communication, plus an awareness of the context in which the communicating takes place.

BY GEORGE

Here’s an example. If you refer to a work colleague as “good old George,” a “low-context” understanding of these words is that George is a mature colleague, a good man and trustworthy. In other words, you mean exactly what you say. If it is generally understood in the office, however, that George is a complete idiot, the words “good old George” could be taken as a sarcastic comment on the fact that George has done something wrong, yet again. The implication is that he can be relied upon to make a mess of things.

The key words here are “generally understood.” People from high-context cultures (European examples include France and the United Kingdom) often share information with their “in-group” members, such as good friends, families and co-workers, and they refer to this information implicitly when they speak. For people who come from “low-context” cultures, like the USA, Germany and the Netherland, this can be a difficult code to break. They think of communication as a way of exchanging information and opinions and so prefer to spell things out clearly and simply.

NOTHING PERSONAL

If a German or Dutch person telephones you during a meal and asks you if they are calling at a bad time. Don’t expect them to hang up if you reply, “Well actually, I’m in the middle of my dinner. “It may be obvious to you that meal time is sacrosanct and you want t spend it in peace with your family, but it may not be obvious to someone outside your cultural group.

If you design a great new gadget and your German or Dutch boss says, “I don’t like it! “ They are not implying that you are a bad designer or that you don’t do your job properly. They are simply saying that they don’t like this particular design, nothing more! Germans and Dutch people have a wonderful ability to separate a person from an idea or invention. So, if they criticize your work, it’s the work and not you they dislike. They find kind of direct criticism constructive!

THE RIGHT TONE

It is important to remember, however that every individual uses both high context and low-context communication. The choice will usually depend on who we’re taking to (a close friend or a stranger) and the circumstances (whether you’re telling a joke, or giving important instructions). To understand, you need a good background knowledge of the context and you have to be culturally intelligent enough to interpret tone of voice, eye contact and posture. We’ll the looking at some of these non-verbal signs next month to help you make sense of what is really being said.