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Source: MAGANEWS.
Drunk talk:
A very drunk man comes out of the bar and sees another very drunk man. he looks up in the sky and says, "Is that the sun or the moon?"
The other drunk man answers, "I don't know, I'm a stranger here myself."
Homework
Teacher: Young man, did you do all your homework last night?
Fred: No, teacher. I did some of it last night, some of it in the middle of the night, and the rest of it early this morning.
Back home
A wife returns home from vacation.
I was away for 6 weeks! And now when I come home, what do I see? You don't care! You have nothing to say! Don't you have at least one word for me after I was away for 6 weekes?
Sure, I have...
What?
Thanks.
At the bottom of the sea
A diver is working at the bottom of the sea. Suddenly, he is ordered to get to the surface:
Quickly, come back up!
Why?
Our ship is sinking!
Family life
Two friends that haven't seen each other for a long time meet in the street:
So, what about family life? Is everything ok?
Everything is fine!
Wife? Kids?
I've told you - everything is fine: no wife, no kids.
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